Created and Uncreated Memories
by Jason Barnett
Summary: Dawn gets a surprise when Willow returns from England.


Created and Uncreated Memories.  
  
Disclaimer: It belongs to Joss.  
  
Dawn gets a surprise when Willow returns to Sunnydale.  
  
Note: I didn't watch the season finale so there's a comment in here about what Warren said while Willow had him. I've seen it several times in fic I'm not sure if it's accurate. I realize I drift a little towards the end but I just felt like I need to tie up an earlier comment in the story. And if you can think of a better title let me know.   
  
"So what do you want to do first Willow?"  
  
"First I'm going to visit Tara's grave, then I'm going to register for classes."  
  
"And then you're going to find a new apartment, right?" Danw asked snidely as she stepped into the room.  
  
"Dawn, I trold you to be nice."  
  
"It's okay Buffy. You just be as mean as you like Dawn, I don't care."  
  
The hostility on Dawn's face faded into confusion. Matched by Buffy's.  
  
"You don't care? Are you sure you're feeling all right, Willow?"  
  
"I'm fine. I guess I really should come clean with you both. You know how I threatened to turn Dawn back into the Key?"  
  
"Yes! How could I forget that?"  
  
"And that's what really bugs you isn't it Dawnie? Not that I killed Warren, because you loved Tara. And not that I almost ended the world because that's the battle that made Buffy decide to let you slay. But you can't let go of the fact I threatened you personally, can you?"  
  
"That's enough, Willow. Of course Dawn cares that you killed Warren. He was a human being, right, Dawn? Dawn?"  
  
Dawn looked away guiltily.   
  
"Dawn?"  
  
"He killed Tara. He tried to kill you. If you get killed whether it's by a human, demon or a god it's all the same to us and to the world."  
  
"That's not right. I thought... you've been raised..... Spike must be"  
  
"Don't you dare blame this on Spike or not respecting the way I was raised. To protect you Mom brought an ax down on top of a man's head. That's says to me killing's okay to protect the people you love."  
  
"That was Spike, not a man. Of course she didn't know about vamps then. Just forget it. What were you saying Willow?"  
  
"Well, I actually started the spell and it started to work. I still remember Dawn. But I also have a set of memories from before Dawn was created. My life took a big downhill turn."  
  
"How dare you blame this on me?"  
  
"Do you remember the first time Buffy died? She spent some time with you and Joyce trying to convince her to go out of town. Then she found out about the massacre in the student lounge? She went to the school and decided to do what she had to. Without you she paid attention to the news a few minutes earlier and found out I was one of the people to find them. She came to me and let me vent my feelings out and was just a big help for me. When Angelus killed my goldfish she was there because she understood it was a message not just the killing of something I cared about, not with you conforting you because he'd left a sketch of you on your bed. The day after our party that the zombies invaded she spent the day sister bonding with you. Instead of with me just talking. Did you know about me blowing the power on my entire block, Buffy?"  
  
"No, you never mentioned that," Buffy sounded surprised with the revealation. "Must've been quite a spell."  
  
"Not really. Just an experiment gone wrong. But that day, I told you about it instead of keeping it a secret. And there was MOO. Dawn warned you your Mom had snapped. You got away from her. They tied Amy and I up to burn us then she turned herself into a rat. You arrived with Giles and Cordelia when I was trapped up there alone and terrified. Well without Dawn you didn't get away. You were right there beside me and I knew you'd save us."  
  
"Oh, yeah, you actually told someone about one of your magic screw ups. You're just making this up to make me feel bad. "  
  
"Believe that if you want. Oh, yeah one other big difference. Involving Vampme. How she ran into Xander and she stormed off when she found out he was alive, then when he grabbed her she flashed her game face. It was a night you were babysitting Dawn."  
  
"Then he went to Giles and then Angel arrived there, looking for me. You told me how Xander shoved a cross in your face and he and Giles gave you a big hug when they realized you were alive. It wasn't until Angel told you she was trying to take Bronze and had attacked you at the school that you came and got me. And we went and I kicked her butt."  
  
"You have no idea how much you hurt me, especially since we'd been fighting, tearing into her without mercy and almost staking her until I stopped you. After everything you went through the last year you wouldn't even try to resoul me."  
  
"That wasn't you Will."  
  
"I know, but this is Sunnydale. Noone is safe and I have so much I want to do. I want to live, I think I'd even want to unlive if I knew I wasn't a danger to people. But I was telling you about before. You arrived at the Bronze. You were the one she flashed her game face at after being very hostile towards you. You and Xander both hugged me, practically crushed me in fact, when I walked into the library."  
  
"Whatever," Dawn sighed as she walked out of the room. However she lacked the attitude and confidence she'd had earlier.  
  
Buffy was sitting on the bed. "Wow, those are some pretty big changes. But you do realize that you're my best friend along with Xander. I'm sorry if I didn't have enough time to show you properly."  
  
"I understand Buffy and I don't blame you. I really think I can finish this myself. Go talk to Dawn."  
  
"Do you think I should? Am I being unreasonable? I just don't..." She trailed off .  
  
"I just killed a man so I'm not the person to ask about that."  
  
"I guess," Buffy mumbled as she left the room.  
******  
  
A few hours later Willow was cursing her decreased endurance as the relatively simple job had exhausted her. "At least I can blame some of it on jet lag." She stretched out on her bed when there was a knock on the door.  
  
"Come in."  
  
Dawn peaked around the door. "Hi, Willow."  
  
"I'm surprised to see you so soon."  
  
"Well, I had some.... I was thinking...."  
  
"Not so easy to hate me if it doesn't give you any power over me?"  
  
"No. Although I should if you sent Buffy down to talk to me. She's all upset about my attitude. Do you think it's wrong?"  
  
"I've recently killed a man so I'm really not the person ask, like I told Buffy. But I doubt that I'll ever be able to give a decisive answer. I killed Warren while he was helpless which part of me doesn't like, but another part of me points out Tara didn't even know she was in danger and when I confronted Warren he'd gained powers so he didn't intend to give up. He was going to fight and he was willing to kill before so why not assume he would do it again. And something he said to me after I had him. He thought it was all like a comic book. That since I was a good guy I'd send him to jail so he could come back to attack us again. I'd never go out and just kill someone but if they were a danget to someone I love then I would. And honestly I know Buffy would too."  
  
Then why does she have to act like that."  
  
"Knowing you might have to do it doesn't make it anymore palatable. With all Buffy does for people the fact that things happen where she might have to kill someone."  
  
"I guess I understand that. Are you going to turn me back into the Key?" she asked pacing.  
  
Willow didn't blink at the sudden change of subject. Dawn would have to be concerned about that. "No."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because I don't do that sort of thing and because Buffy loves you and I know not having any family would hurt her badly."  
  
"But I'm not really family. You know that."  
  
"I've got memories of two Buffy's. The Buffy who has Dawn Summer's as a sister loves her and doesn't know how to survive without her. The Buffy who doesn't is happy enough, but she doesn't know what she's missing and ceases to exist two years ago. So I have no idea how she'd react to any of the things your sister has gone through."  
  
"But your life is worse because of me," she said looking through a small box on Willow's dresser.   
  
"I don't know that. Her life ended two years ago, same as the other Buffy. She was more secure in her life than I was, but for all I know she could've been dead by now or anything else. This is my life I have to live it."  
  
"This looks like magic stuff."  
  
"It is. It's perishable, so I'm giving it to Anya to sell. It'll be while before I do any real powerful magic. I have to learn how to do things on my own again and not try to be Sabrina."  
  
"But you're doing some?"  
  
"Levitation. It just kind of comes naturally for me when I do the mediatations they taught me and try to find my emotional control again."  
  
"So this stuff..."  
  
"Definately isn't going to turn you into a ball of energy."  
  
"Good, I was kind of worried when you said you didn't care about me."  
  
"I didn't say that. I just said I didn't care if you were mean to me. Sort of like with Cordelia. I didn't care if she disliked me. But it was nice when she did."  
  
"So, you'd like to have me as a friend?"  
  
"Sure, you're smart, brave and loyal. You just need to do something about the whining and massive moods swings."  
  
"Did I actually make anyone's life better? Buffy or Mom or Xander? I bet I didn't. Mom probably didn't get bit because I didn't let Darla in before I went to bed that night."  
  
"No , she let Darla in. Buffy spent two weeks in an institution but she didn't have to watch her mother try to burn her at the stake so that's a plus. Xander got to be the object of a crush, but he had to fight off way more pre teens than he was comfortable with the love spell."  
  
"Maybe Giles, Tara or Anya? With Angel I was another person to ask where Buffy was and Cordelia must've just had one less person to give fashion advice to."  
  
"You're right about them. Giles was pretty much the same. I'd only known Tara a few months when you appeared and I barely knew Anya, so for the most part I can't say."  
  
"So I didn't make a positive impact on anyone's life."  
  
"Faith."  
  
"Faith, as in Faith the Vampire Slayer?"  
  
"Do you know any others?"  
  
"No, but I thought maybe you meant I had to have Faith. How is it possible Faith turned out worse?"  
  
"Well, when Xander went to talk to her and she tossed him out physically and then Angel hit her with a bat, she actually tried to strangle him."  
  
"Why didn't she?"  
  
" 'Cause she knew you cared him. The way she always protected you, even when they exchanged the Box of Gavrok for me and the Mayor was right there."  
  
Dawn nodded remembering how the vampire had grabbed her and within seconds he had been dust, Faith scowling at the other vamps present and reminding them that she had declared Dawn off limits.  
  
"Why the hell did Buffy take me there? I never figured it out and she never said."  
  
"The Mayor insisted. He said you might curb Buffy's violent tendencies."  
  
"My God that guy was nuts."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Do you mind if I come with you when you go visit Tara? I think she'd like it if she knew we were okay with each other."  
  
"She would. You're more than welcome to come."  
  
End 


End file.
